3 Practical Steps to Tame Your Internal Critic

“I see you want to be a journalist. The problem is that your words and your work don’t match up.”

My brows knit together involuntarily, clearly displaying the confusion on my face.

“Miss Diffin, you will never become a journalist turning in sloppy work like this.”

Her words struck like barbs. My face scorched as if seared by the sun, and the room's air seemed to evaporate, leaving a suffocating heat that made me weak in the knees.

What she didn’t know was the effort I had poured into that essay. I had spent countless hours revising and consulting the dictionary for spell-checking. Multiple people had proofread it for me.

It felt like gaslighting, although I had no name for it then. She offered no examples to justify her critique, yet that made no difference. She was the professional; I was just a poor girl with the audacity to dream of rising above anything I had ever seen modeled for me.

I was seventeen, a participant in the only pageant of my life. She was the third and final judge to interview me. Moreover, she became the thief of hope, her voice haunting me for decades.

Perhaps you've never experienced a moment exactly like this, but you might have felt similar despair when someone tried to tear you down. Often, there's a voice—a persistent echo in the well-worn pathways of your subconscious—that resurfaces whenever you venture into something new or beyond your current expertise.

As prolific author Anne Lamont so famously says, “If your intuition tells you that your story sucks, make sure it’s your intuition and not your mother.” Or perhaps not the person who once tore you down.

Here are three ways you can silence those “voices” and forge ahead as you set out to write your book:

Schedule Structured Reflection Sessions

Set aside time specifically to reflect on your doubts and fears. Make this a formal journaling session where you can write about your feelings, concerns, and the critical voices you hear. Externalizing these thoughts allows you to more objectively assess their validity and impact, helping you separate unfounded fears from constructive criticism.

Practice Mindfulness and Affirmations

Stay present and focused by practicing mindfulness. Simple techniques like mindful breathing or meditation can help maintain a clear and centered mind, which is crucial for your creative tasks. Additionally, use positive affirmations tailored to counter specific doubts to reinforce your self-esteem and confidence. For example, if you doubt your writing style, affirm regularly, “My unique voice is valuable and resonates with my readers.”

Develop Constructive Feedback Loops with a Book Coach

Build a supportive network that includes a book coach who can provide constructive and encouraging feedback. Working with a coach can help you refine your work and strengthen your ability to differentiate between irrational internal criticisms and useful external feedback. A coach understands your goals and can guide you through the writing process with expert advice and reassurance.

You've Got This!

Remember, every expert faces moments of doubt, but it’s how you respond to these challenges that can amplify your impact and growth. You already offer unique insights and expertise that support others; a book will enable you to help in an even bigger way, while also advancing your business, organization, or movement. Don’t let those old voices hold you back. With the right strategies and support, you can communicate your knowledge confidently and transform your expertise into a powerful tool for positive change—for future clients and your business.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Life and business strategist turned bestselling book coach, publishing mentor, and founder of She Gets Published, Lanette Pottle, helps female coaches and entrepreneurs create books that lead to new clients, bigger stages, & more profits. Need help getting started ( or unstuck) on your book journey? Book a call with Lanette today.